Project Pump: Lip Pump.

Generally I live by the beauty mantra that I will try anything once. Be it a product, device or treatment of some sort – you name it and I have likely tried it. So when I was looking up lip treatments and I stumbled upon an actual pump for your lips I was both doubtful yet intrigued. I chose and ordered the Cynthia Rowland Luscious Lips Lip Pump plus Therapeutic Lip Crème online from their website and it came a few weeks later in the mail (God only knows what the border officials thought of the contraption).


There are instructions and even a warning on the device telling you not to use it until you’ve read the instructions thoroughly, I thought of skipping straight to the “place on face and look like Angelina Jolie” phase, but the idea that I might come out looking like poor Lisa Rinna had me reading before plumping. Similar to say, learning how to swim or training for a marathon, you can’t simply start using the pump without priming your lips on a daily basis to get them used to being sucked up into a tube without bruising your face. Yikes. That sounded painful. So dutifully I used the pump for two weeks on a semi-regular basis (they call it the conditioning period) with barely a noticeable plump, as I was only using it for the prescribed short intervals. The actual feeling is as described above, picture placing an empty toilet paper roll, albeit a bright red Lucite one, on your lips and pulling a tube at the end to suck them up into the roll. Fascinated yet?Picture doing this in front of anyone- my better half saw it once and asked me if I had indeed lost my mind.

Finally when the instructions deemed that I was allowed to go full-fledged suction, I wasted no time going for broke. I sucked and pulled and plumped and by the time the suggested time period was up I was shocked that my lips were huge. I mean, actually looked like I had collagen injections, but not crazy duck-face huge. There was however a noticeable ring mark above and below my lips where the pump had pressed against by face, but that went away and also was covered by basic foundation (as a word of suggestion, do the pumping before you put makeup on in case of said ring).

Even more shocking was that when I went out to a comedy show that night with friends one of the fellas we were with, yes a man noticed something, immediately remarked that he liked my lipstick and that I looked great – case in point he was noticing my considerably larger pucker.

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A few things to note, while the Therapeutic Lip Crème was lovely and velvety at first, after about two months in my medicine cabinet it almost completely dried up. Also, the plumping effect only lasts about 2-3 hours, at least for me; I am sure some folks have noticed a longer effect as per their website suggesting 4-8 hours. Now, they suggested re-plumping during the day. For me, this is a fun thing to do for a special occasion like a wedding to give a mini confidence boost; I can’t imagine being at work and sneaking to the bathroom to hide in the stall and pump my lips, or at my desk (feels like it might be a career limiting kind of move).

All in all, the product does work, and being $60 and not having to literally inject anything into your lips, seems like a relatively good deal if you are looking for that short-lived Kim Kardashian look.

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